Soul Bonds and Reunification in Death

שִׂימֵ֨נִי כַֽחוֹתָ֜ם עַל־לִבֶּ֗ךָ כַּֽחוֹתָם֙ עַל־זְרוֹעֶ֔ךָ כִּֽי־עַזָּ֤ה כַמָּ֙וֶת֙ אַהֲבָ֔ה קָשָׁ֥ה כִשְׁא֖וֹל קִנְאָ֑ה רְשָׁפֶ֕יהָ רִשְׁפֵּ֕י אֵ֖שׁ שַׁלְהֶ֥בֶתְיָֽה׃

Let me be a seal upon your heart, Like the seal upon your hand. For love is fierce as death, Passion is mighty as Sheol; Its darts are darts of fire, A blazing flame.

עַל־כֵּן֙ יַֽעֲזׇב־אִ֔ישׁ אֶת־אָבִ֖יו וְאֶת־אִמּ֑וֹ וְדָבַ֣ק בְּאִשְׁתּ֔וֹ וְהָי֖וּ לְבָשָׂ֥ר אֶחָֽד׃

Hence a man leaves his father and mother and clings to his wife, so that they become one flesh.

אֲזַל יְתֵיב אַגּוּדָּא דְּנַהֲרָא. שְׁמַע לְהַהִיא רְבִיתָא דַּהֲווֹ קָרוּ לַהּ: ״בַּת חֲכִינַאי, בַּת חֲכִינַאי, מַלַּי קוּלְּתִיךְ וְתָא נֵיזִיל״. אֲמַר: שְׁמַע מִינַּהּ הַאי רְבִיתָא דִּידַן. אֲזַל בָּתְרַהּ. הֲוָה יְתִיבָא דְּבֵיתְהוּ קָא נָהֲלָה קִמְחָא, דַּל עֵינַהּ חֲזִיתֵיהּ, סְוִי לִבַּהּ, פְּרַח רוּחַהּ, אָמַר לְפָנָיו: רִבּוֹנוֹ שֶׁל עוֹלָם, עֲנִיָּיה זוֹ זֶה שְׂכָרָהּ?! בְּעָא רַחֲמֵי עֲלַהּ וְ[אַ]חֲיַיהּ.

He went and sat on the bank of the river and heard people calling to a certain girl: Daughter of Ḥakhinai, daughter of Ḥakhinai, fill your pitcher and come up. He said: I can conclude from this that this is our daughter, meaning his own daughter, whom he had not recognized after so many years. He followed her to his house. His wife was sitting and sifting flour. She lifted her eyes up, saw him and recognized him, and her heart fluttered with agitation and she passed away from the emotional stress. Rabbi Ḥananya said before God: Master of the universe, is this the reward of this poor woman? He pleaded for mercy for her and she lived.

תַּנְיָא נָמֵי הָכִי: תְּשַׁע מֵאוֹת וּשְׁלֹשָׁה מִינֵי מִיתָה נִבְרְאוּ בָּעוֹלָם, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״לַמָּוֶת תּוֹצָאוֹת״, ״תּוֹצָאוֹת״ בְּגִימַטְרִיָּא הָכִי הָווּ. קָשָׁה שֶׁבְּכֻלָּן — אַסְכָּרָא, נִיחָא שֶׁבְּכֻלָּן — נְשִׁיקָה. אַסְכָּרָא דָּמְיָא כְּחִיזְרָא בִּגְבָבָא דְעַמְרָא דִּלְאַחוֹרֵי נַשְׁרָא, וְאִיכָּא דְאָמְרִי כְּפִיטּוּרֵי בְּפִי וֶשֶׁט, נְשִׁיקָה דָּמְיָא כְּמִשְׁחַל בִּנִיתָא מֵחֲלָבָא. רַבִּי יוֹחָנָן אָמַר: ״לְעֵת מְצֹא״ — זוֹ קְבוּרָה. אָמַר רַבִּי חֲנִינָא, מַאי קְרָא ״הַשְּׂמֵחִים אֱלֵי גִיל יָשִׂישׂוּ כִּי יִמְצְאוּ קָבֶר״. אָמַר רַבָּה בַּר רַב שֵׁילָא, הַיְינוּ דְּאָמְרִי אִינָשֵׁי: לִיבְעֵי אִינָשׁ רַחֲמֵי אֲפִילּוּ עַד זִיבּוּלָא בָּתְרָיְיתָא שְׁלָמָא.

It was also taught in a baraita: Nine hundred and three types of death were created in the world, as it is stated: “Issues [totzaot] of death,” and that, 903, is the numerical value [gimatriya] of totzaot. The Gemara explains that the most difficult of all these types of death is croup [askara], while the easiest is the kiss of death. Croup is like a thorn entangled in a wool fleece, which, when pulled out backwards, tears the wool. Some say that croup is like ropes at the entrance to the esophagus, which would be nearly impossible to insert and excruciating to remove. The kiss of death is like drawing a hair from milk. One should pray that he does not die a painful death. Rabbi Yoḥanan said: The time of finding refers to a respectful burial, for which one should pray. Supporting Rabbi Yoḥanan’s interpretation, Rabbi Ḥanina said: What is the verse that teaches that the time of finding refers to burial? “Who rejoice in exultation and are glad when they can find a grave” (Job 3:22), as there are situations in which one is relieved when his body finds a grave in which to rest. Rabba bar Rav Sheila said, that is the meaning of the folk saying: A person should even pray for mercy until the final shovelful of dirt is thrown upon his grave.

תָּנוּ רַבָּנַן: מֵת פִּתְאוֹם — זוֹ הִיא מִיתָה חֲטוּפָה, חָלָה יוֹם אֶחָד וָמֵת — זוֹ הִיא מִיתָה דְּחוּפָה. רַבִּי חֲנַנְיָא בֶּן גַּמְלִיאֵל אוֹמֵר: זוֹ הִיא מִיתַת מַגֵּפָה, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״בֶּן אָדָם הִנְנִי לוֹקֵחַ מִמְּךָ אֶת מַחְמַד עֵינֶיךָ בְּמַגֵּפָה״, וּכְתִיב: ״וָאֲדַבֵּר אֶל הָעָם בַּבֹּקֶר וַתָּמׇת אִשְׁתִּי בָּעָרֶב״.

§ The Sages taught the following baraita: If one dies suddenly without having been sick, this is death through snatching. If he became sick for a day and died, this is an expedited death. Rabbi Ḥananya ben Gamliel says: This is death at a stroke, as it is stated: “Son of man, behold, I am about to take away from you the delight of your eyes at a stroke” (Ezekiel 24:16). And when this prophecy is fulfilled it is written: “So I spoke to the people in the morning and at evening my wife died” (Ezekiel 24:18).

וְעַל דָּא אָתֵי מְכִילְתָּא דְרַחֲמֵי וְדִינָא לְחוּד, יִשְׂרָאֵל, וְיַהֲבִית (וישראל יהבית) יַתְהוֹן בְּאַרְעָא גָּלוּתְהוֹן. יָאוֹת בָּעֵי בְּרִי, אֲבָל אִינִישׁ מִסְתַּכֵּל וְיִנְדַע יָתֵיהּ, יַעֲקֹב דְּמִתְלַף עִם וַיְחִי, קֹדֶשׁ. וְעַל דְּנָא רָזָא אָמְרִין, יַעֲקֹב בָּחַר יָתֵיהּ סַפִּירָא בְּכוּרְסֵי יְקָרָא. רִבִּי שִׁמְעוֹן פָּתַח וְאָמַר, (ישעיהו נ״ז:ט״ו) וְאֶת דַּכָּא וּשְׁפַל רוּחַ לְהַחֲיוֹת רוּחַ שְׁפָלִים וּלְהַחֲיוֹת לֵב נִדְכָּאִים.

For God mates couples before they are born, and when a man is worthy he obtains a wife according to his deserts. Sometimes it happens that after the lot has been cast, that man perverts his ways, and then his mate is transferred to another until he rectifies his ways, or else until his time comes, and then the other is removed to make way for him and he comes into his own; and this is grievous in the sight of God, to remove one man to make way for another.

ואיתא בספרים הטעם שאנו רואים שלפעמים באים שני בני אדם ואוהבים זה את זה מאוד גם שלא היו מכירים זה את זה מקודם כי אם עתה מקרוב באו ונתוועדו יחד ושניהם דבקו יחדיו באהבה רבה, והטעם מחמת שהיו שכנים זה אצל זה בישיבתם בגן עדן יחד ועתה בבואם להדדי נתעורר בהם אהבה הישנה שהיתה בהם בגן עדן.