Halachaהלכה

Male Teachers of Girls: Permissibility and Limitations

These sources address whether a man may serve as an educator for young girls in religious subjects such as prayer and liturgical singing. The sources examine the halakhic restrictions and exceptions regarding male-female learning relationships, considering both the obligation to teach and concerns about impropriety.

אבל לא יתכן לבחור ללמוד לבנות

2 sources · all verified

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What the sources say

The most direct ruling comes from Sefer Chasidim 313, which explicitly states that it is not fitting for a young man to teach daughters — even if the father is present and watching to prevent seclusion — because desire may overcome either the teacher or the student, and because "a woman's voice is nakedness" (kol b'ishah ervah); the passage concludes that it is the father himself who should teach his daughter, not an outside male teacher.

This concern applies with particular force to the context of prayer and song, since Sefer Chasidim 313 invokes the principle of kol b'ishah ervah precisely in the instructional setting, making singing zemiros with or before girls a direct extension of the prohibition articulated there.

The underlying asymmetry is grounded in Kiddushin 29b, which establishes that women are not obligated in Torah study the way men are, and that the obligation to teach tracks the obligation to learn — a structure that leaves the father, not an external male instructor, as the natural address for a daughter's religious education, consistent with what Sefer Chasidim 313 prescribes.

Source 1 · Chazal
Verified

Kiddushin

קידושין כ״ט ב — ד"ה לְלַמְּדוֹ תּוֹרָה

Kiddushin 29b:8

A father is obligated to teach his son Torah based on Deuteronomy 11:19, and if his father does not teach him, he must teach himself; however, a woman is not obligated to learn Torah and therefore is not obligated to teach it or teach herself, since the same verse specifies "your sons" and not daughters.

לְלַמְּדוֹ תּוֹרָה. מְנָלַן? דִּכְתִיב: ״וְלִמַּדְתֶּם אֹתָם אֶת בְּנֵיכֶם״. וְהֵיכָא דְּלָא אַגְמְרֵיהּ אֲבוּהּ מִיחַיַּיב אִיהוּ לְמִיגְמַר נַפְשֵׁיהּ, דִּכְתִיב: ״וּלְמַדְתֶּם״. אִיהִי מְנָלַן דְּלָא מִיחַיְּיבָא? דִּכְתִיב: ״וְלִימַּדְתֶּם״ ״וּלְמַדְתֶּם״, כֹּל שֶׁמְּצֻוֶּוה לִלְמוֹד – מְצֻוֶּוה לְלַמֵּד, וְכֹל שֶׁאֵינוֹ מְצֻוֶּוה לִלְמוֹד – אֵינוֹ מְצֻוֶּוה לְלַמֵּד. וְאִיהִי מְנָלַן דְּלָא מִיחַיְּיבָה לְמֵילַף נַפְשַׁהּ? דִּכְתִיב: ״וְלִימַּדְתֶּם״ ״וּלְמַדְתֶּם״, כֹּל שֶׁאֲחֵרִים מְצֻוִּוין לְלַמְּדוֹ – מְצֻוֶּוה לְלַמֵּד אֶת עַצְמוֹ, וְכֹל שֶׁאֵין אֲחֵרִים מְצֻוִּוין לְלַמְּדוֹ – אֵין מְצֻוֶּוה לְלַמֵּד אֶת עַצְמוֹ. וּמִנַּיִן שֶׁאֵין אֲחֵרִים מְצֻוִּוין לְלַמְּדָהּ? דְּאָמַר קְרָא: ״וְלִמַּדְתֶּם אֹתָם אֶת בְּנֵיכֶם״ אֶת בְּנֵיכֶם, וְלֹא בְּנוֹתֵיכֶם.

§ The baraita teaches that a father is obligated to teach his son Torah. The Gemara asks: From where do we derive this requirement? As it is written: “And you shall teach them [velimadtem] to your sons” (Deuteronomy 11:19). And in a case where his father did not teach him he is obligated to teach himself, as it is written, i.e., the verse can be read with a different vocalization: And you shall study [ulmadtem]. From where do we derive that a woman is not obligated to teach her son Torah? As it is written: “And you shall teach [velimadtem],” which can be read as: And you shall study [ulmadtem]. This indicates that whoever is commanded to study Torah is commanded to teach, and whoever is not commanded to study is not commanded to teach. Since a woman is not obligated to learn Torah, she is likewise not obligated to teach it. The Gemara asks: And from where do we derive that she is not obligated to teach herself? The Gemara answers: As it is written: “And you shall teach [velimadtem],” which can be read as: And you shall study [ulmadtem], which indicates that whoever others are commanded to teach is commanded to teach himself, and whoever others are not commanded to teach is not commanded to teach himself. And from where is it derived that others are not commanded to teach a woman? As the verse states: “And you shall teach them to your sons” (Deuteronomy 11:19), which emphasizes: Your sons and not your daughters.

Source 2 · Rishonim
Verified

Sefer Chasidim 313

Sefer Chasidim 313

A man may not teach girls, even if a father stands guard to prevent seclusion, because desire may overpower him or her; however, a father may teach his own daughter and wife, and a woman may go listen to a scholar's sermon, as evidenced by the Shunamite woman who went to hear Elisha.

טפכם נשיכם וגרך אשר בקרב מחניך מחטב עציך עד שואב מימיך כדי שידעו עבדים ושפחות פסקי המצות מה לעשות ומה שלא לעשות אבל לא יתכן לבחור ללמוד לבנות ואפילו האב עומד שם ושומר פן יתייחד לא יתכן פן יתגבר יצרו עליה או יצרה עליו וקול באשה ערוה אלא האב ילמוד בתו ואשתו והשונמית הולכת ושומעת הדרשה מפי אלישע שהרי אמר מדוע את הולכת אליו היום לא חדש ולא שבת מכלל דבחדש ושבת הולכת: